


At the End - In the Beginning

by astudyinfic



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Footnotes, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, M/M, Post-Canon, ineffable husbands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 06:38:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19145569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astudyinfic/pseuds/astudyinfic
Summary: Six thousand years of missed opportunities, of misunderstandings, of never saying what they truly meant.  Of never quite figuring it out.Some might say that was too long, but for a certain angel and demon, they were moving at exactly the right pace for it all to lead to right here, right now.





	At the End - In the Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Playing fast and loose with book and show canon. The lines have been irreparably blurred. Oops?
> 
> A huge thank you to [sunaddicted](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunaddicted/pseuds/sunaddicted) for guidance and moral support.

It took almost a full day after the near-armageddon for Crowley’s question to really sink in.  Too much of Aziraphale’s mind had been occupied with getting back to this plane of existence after the inconvenient decorporealization.  And then with stopping the Antichrist. And then with stopping the Antichrist’s father.*  Then Heaven and Hell came for his and Crowley’s heads, so it wasn’t until they were walking back to the bookshop following a lovely lunch at the Ritz that Aziraphale realized what Crowley had asked him back before they ever made it to Tadfield.

A light rain had started to fall when Aziraphale came to a stop just outside the door to his shop.  Of course, it didn’t wet either him or his companion but it added a weight to the realization that hit Aziraphale like a bolt of lightning.  “You asked me to leave the Earth,” he said out of the blue.

Crowley raised a brow, staying silent for a moment.  “Yes, I did. A few days ago.” He glanced around nervously before asking, “Mind if we continue this conversation inside?”  None of the humans around them paid them any mind but it still felt like this was a topic best broached away from prying ears and eyes.  He held the door open and gestured for Aziraphale to enter.

“You said you were going to leave and you wanted me to come with you.”  Aziraphale turned to look at Crowley the moment they were safely behind the closed door.  “I said no and you are still here.”

“Yes, well.”  Crowley didn’t want to answer that because that led to _other_ questions.  Questions he wasn’t ready to think about just yet.  At least not without a good deal of alcohol and some distance between him and the angel currently frowning at him from across the room.  Throwing himself down on one of the chairs towards the back of the store, Crowley hoped he conveyed the nonchalance he was going for, despite the fact that his internal monologue went something like, _Shitshitshitshitshit._

Whether Aziraphale saw right through his charade (quite likely considering just how long they’d known one another) or if he was just being his persistent, slightly baffled self, Crowley didn’t know.  What he did know was that the angel poured each of them a glass of wine and sat down opposite him, prim and proper as always. “You were going to leave, Crowley. Why are you still here? Mind you, I’m beyond happy to have you still around but something must have kept you here.”

Aziraphale stared at him with eyes wide and guileless and Crowley scrambled for something to say. It would be so easy just to lie but after the Armageddon that never was, Aziraphale deserved better than that.  He took a large drink of wine to bolster his courage. “I thought my best friend was gone, murdered by your people or mine. There was no reason to leave anymore if you weren’t going with me.”

The angel blinked then his expression softened.  “Oh, my dear. I wasn’t gone...”

“But I didn’t know that at the time.  I walk into your bookshop and it was on fire, Aziraphale!  If you were anywhere on Earth, you would never have let the shop burn.  So what was I supposed to think?” Crowley pushed himself to his feet, pacing and running his hands through his hair.  He’d lost some of his swagger, too caught up in the memory of the fire and his absolute terror to think of anything else.  

Thankful that he hadn’t seen his beloved books as they burned, Aziraphale spared a moment for a quick prayer of thanks (even if he wasn’t sure if anyone up there was listening anymore) that everything returned the way it was.  Adam had changed everything back to before the Almostageddon, with a few small changes. There were certainly books on the shelf Aziraphale knew weren't there before.

_Before._

“Wait?  You were going to stay and face Armageddon instead of saving yourself?”  He finally got himself away from thoughts of his books and back to the matter at hand.  When Crowley nodded, Aziraphale gasped, covering his mouth with his hand. “You would have died!  Not just discorporated, but actual true death.” The thought was enough to make him feel sick, even when it was almost impossible for him to do so.

“Yes, well, Alpha Centauri wouldn’t have been that nice.”  The _without you_ hung in the air between them. “It’s really not one of the good ones.** Mostly just convenient.”

“Crowley!”  Aziraphale pushed himself to his feet, continuing to shake his head.  Crowley didn’t even know if Aziraphale was aware of it anymore. “You...  I... An earth without you is not one I would want to live on.” The moment the words were out of his mouth, they both froze and stared at one another.  Like so many things since the beginning of The Arrangement, this was something that had never been spoken before.

Maybe it was time to lay some things bare.  There had been too many things left unsaid that would have remained unsaid if they hadn’t managed to save the world.  “Promise me you won’t do anything that foolish again. You can’t die, Crowley. You just can’t. ”

Crowley shook his head and stepped closer, the air thick between them.  “Then you know how I felt. What good is the universe if you aren’t in it, Angel?”  While the word was spoken, the capital was clearly heard by them both. Not just a title, an endearment and one Crowley had said so many times before, full of meaning without either of them understanding.  

“You were going to die because I was gone?  Oh, my dear...it was a suicide mission. I can hardly bear the thought of it even now.”  Aziraphale’s normal fluttering reached a fevered pace until he placed both his hands on Crowley’s upper arms, a desperate attempt to prove to himself that the demon was still here.

Crowley shook his head.  “I wasn’t going to die. Well, I mean, I was.  It was Armageddon. We were all going to die. But I was going to...well, I was going to avenge you or die trying.  I thought they killed you, Aziraphale, and for that, they deserved to suffer.” It didn’t matter if it was Heaven or Hell that did the killing, Crowley would take them all down if they hurt one hair on the angel’s head.

Which really said something when he thought about it.

They stood close enough to feel the other’s breath on his face, both of them reeling from the revelations that hit them at that moment.  That whatever this was between them, it was more than an Arrangement, more than antagonism, more than even friendship.

Whatever this was, it was everything.

To both of them.

Aziraphale broke the silence first, never one for letting the conversation lapse for too long.  “I had no idea, my dear. Why...why didn’t you say something?”

“You could have said something too,” Crowley mumbled, sounding more like a petulant child than a powerful demon.  “I shouldn’t have to do everything.”

Frowning, Aziraphale took the sunglasses off Crowley’s face and stared at him intently.  He knew every line, every hair. He loved everything about the demon, even the golden snake eyes Crowley kept covered most of the time.  They made him who he was.

Demon.

Friend.

Beloved.

“I think...I think we’ve been saying it for a long time.  We just didn’t realize it.” Because thinking back, Aziraphale could remember so many times when what he said really meant _I love you_.

**“No, no, I didn’t say that.  I’ll get used to it.”**   _(I love you no matter who you are.)_

**“You go too fast for me, Crowley.”**   _(I love you and I’m scared.)_

**“You can’t leave, Crowley.”** _(I love you.  Please don’t leave me.)_

**“I don’t think my side would like that.”** _(I don’t care, though, because I love you.)_

Likewise, so many of the things Crowley said to him over the last few days (years, decades, centuries, millennia), could be interpreted the same way.  How long had the two of them been dancing around the truth without ever knowing it?

The end of the world had come and gone, yet they remained.  If there was a better time to finally say the words that had been in the background of all their interactions since the literal dawn of time, Aziraphale didn’t know what it would be.

“I love you, Crowley.”  The moment the words were out, everything felt lighter.  A truth he’d carried with him - a burden he bore all on his own - lifted and Aziraphale could breathe.  

The nerves were there, of course.  Maybe he read this wrong. Maybe it was a very long con temptation Crowley had been running, which meant the angel had fallen for it completely.  But after knowing someone for six thousand years, you got a feel for the type of person they are. And while Crowley was a demon, he was also a good man.

Aziraphale didn’t expect to hear the words in return.  Some sentiment, yes, but the word love was rarely in a demon’s vocabulary and he wouldn’t hold it against Crowley if he couldn’t say it back.  

When Crowley’s hands settled on his waist and pulled Aziraphale ever closer, he said the words as simple as breathing.  “I love you too, Angel.”

Which was all very good and Aziraphale would have to spend several nights thinking on just how warm that made him feel.  But before he could do anything but send a beaming smile in Crowley’s direction, the demon closed the distance between them and kissed him.  

Kisses were a uniquely human thing.  Aziraphale doubted any of the angels had ever experienced one (never one for sullying their heavenly forms, after all) and most demons wouldn’t go in for the intimacy involved in such an act.  Which made the experience all that much better.

It was chaste by human standards, closed lips pressed tight together while hands scrambled to pull the other closer.  But both wondered if there had ever been such a kiss before. Aziraphale’s lips cooled when they touched Crowley, a pleasant buzz of demonic energy sending a shiver through him that had nothing to do with his cold-blooded companion’s temperature.  For Crowley, it was like trying to kiss a star, a sun. The heat and the brightness and the absolute joy radiating off Aziraphale was just this side of painful and he pulled the angel flush against him so he could feel it all over.

Pulling back enough to look at one another, Crowley smiled one of his true, happy smiles that Aziraphale was just now realizing were all for him.  “How long?” To anyone else, the question would have been nonsensical but Aziraphale understood immediately.

“Realized it at the Blitz when you saved my life and then saved my books.  You went on consecrated ground to save my corporeal form. How could I not love someone willing to make that kind of sacrifice?”  Biting his lip, he looked down for a moment then back up with a sad smile. “I think it was long before that, however. The Globe theatre, perhaps?  Maybe even Rome. I was trying so hard to keep you away when all I wanted to do was pull you closer.” But Heaven would have seen. Heaven would not have approved.  And Aziraphale was terrified what would have happened.***

But now, it was as Crowley said.  They were on their own side. And it didn’t matter what Heaven or Hell thought.  Because they were terrified of Aziraphale and Crowley as a pair and they wouldn’t be coming after them for a long time. At least, that was the hope.

“It was Rome for me,” Crowley offered.  “You invited me to lunch like you didn’t see a problem in the world about dining with a demon.  I knew you were special when you gave your sword away but it wasn’t until then that I realized how special you were to me.”

“We’ve both been kind of silly when we think about it.”  

All those years that they could have been together, years that some might have said were wasted.  But when they looked back over the path they’d taken, they realized this was the only way it ever could have been.  An angel and a demon would never be able to have an easy route to love. It would take a miracle. Or demonic intervention

Or the end of the world.

Luckily for them, they had all three.

After the end of the world came a new beginning.

And in the beginning, they were there.  Together this time, and for all the time to come.

* * *

 

*In the coming centuries, scholars will wonder about the Antichrist rebelling against his own father, who rebelled against his father all those years ago.  The consensus they reach will come to be known as “The Second Apple” as a reference both to Eden as well as the old adage _The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree_. _

**Alpha Centauri was not one of the places Crowley worked on back before he started hanging around the wrong people.  Planets were more complicated, you see. But his work on nebulas earned him several commendations. Not that Heaven would remember that now._

***Unbeknownst to the angel, the two of them falling in love had always been a part of the ineffable plan.  But considering it was ineffable, there was no way for him to have known that. God, however, was quite pleased with both of them when they finally got over themselves and did what She’d been waiting for all along._

**Author's Note:**

> So, I've been in this fandom for years. YEARS. But I have never once felt the need to write fic. There was already so much good stuff out there, what did I have to offer?
> 
> But then the show happened and I reread the book and really, how could I not write now? This is my first attempt at writing for a fandom I've been in for approximately twenty years. 
> 
> Yeah, it's not six thousand, but it's still a lot. Better late than never, right?
> 
> Come yell at me on tumblr at [astudyinfic](http://astudyinfic.tumblr.com) or twitter at [astudyinfic](http://twitter.com/astudyinfic).


End file.
